There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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