someone owes me an orgasm
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
