but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
The beer is more important than you right now.
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i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
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no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
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