Texts From Last Night

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  (161): View more from

  that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.

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  (161): that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face. http://tfl.nu/0pd0
  Replies (22) Good night (1466) Bad night (3419) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out

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  (740): I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out http://tfl.nu/uo3s
  Replies (14) Good night (5043) Bad night (566) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.

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  (614): We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams. http://tfl.nu/ox7r
  Replies (47) Good night (10588) Bad night (655)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Whats the count minus fat chicks?

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  (810): Whats the count minus fat chicks? http://tfl.nu/9ldi
  Replies (28) Good night (1119) Bad night (3722) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.

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  (412): I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is. http://tfl.nu/ejf0
  Replies (12) Good night (5006) Bad night (1162) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.

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  (305): Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level. http://tfl.nu/s74q
  Replies (5) Good night (2830) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.

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  (724): i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that. http://tfl.nu/tj9k
  Replies (6) Good night (5445) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (626): View more from California

  How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.

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  (626): How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans. http://tfl.nu/e33l
  Replies (12) Good night (2512) Bad night (975) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.

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  (770): Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar. http://tfl.nu/qm52
  Replies (10) Good night (1830) Bad night (1034)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.

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  (978): I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call. http://tfl.nu/ftpa
  Replies (18) Good night (2373) Bad night (801) Order T-Shirt
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor

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  (574): I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor http://tfl.nu/63e2
  Replies (1) Good night (773) Bad night (1047) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.

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  (401): The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm. http://tfl.nu/9ejj
  Replies (15) Good night (2331) Bad night (436) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.

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  (678): It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls. http://tfl.nu/0s5d
  Replies (6) Good night (1018) Bad night (432) Order T-Shirt
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  "I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."

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  (219): "I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance." http://tfl.nu/fhmo
  Replies (6) Good night (614) Bad night (207) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.

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  (902): I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom. http://tfl.nu/lro3
  Replies (1) Good night (330) Bad night (689)

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