I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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