May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
