apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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