everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
