The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
