No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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