i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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