belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
