it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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