hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
