if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
