I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
