Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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