Three words: puerto rican gang bang
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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