You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
