And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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