pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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