The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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