its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
