I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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