All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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