i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
