Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
