I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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