I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
