69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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