My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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