hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
