I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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