This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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