I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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