just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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