You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
