can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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