I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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