so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
