Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
