it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
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he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
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I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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