He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
