There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.