therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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