3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
