just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
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