just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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