his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I have already put on my inside pants.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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