I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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